Love is spelled t-i-m-e

Time is not something we can store up to use at a later date. Once the minutes have passed by on the clock, they are gone – forever. We need to embrace each opportunity that comes our way, and make the most of it. For example, when your child comes to you and says, “Please play with me,” would you say that it’s more important to take the time out to spend a few minutes with them, or are the dishes and laundry more important? I read an article where a little girl told her grandmother, “Whenever I ask Mommy to play, she always says, ‘In a minute, honey,’ but the things she is doing always take lots longer than that, and then sometimes she forgets.”

Parents, those “please play with me” moments do not, and will not, last forever. Cherish them now, and take the opportunity to spend a few minutes with your child. The years go by faster than you think, and it will be too late to ask where the time has gone when the children have moved out. A few moments time out with your child should surely rank far higher than a clean floor, or a pile of laundry that needs doing.

Yes, on one hand, I am saying that we shouldn’t procrastinate when things that need to be done, but on the other hand, family time is also extremely important. Children won’t always remember the toys and expensive gadgets we buy for them, but they will remember the amount of time we spent with them. Children tend to spell love as t-i-m-e, and not as t-o-y-s or m-o-n-e-y.

By taking those few moments and spending it with them, and giving them a little undivided attention, we are telling them that, yes, they are extremely important, and they mean a lot to us. So often, I have heard parents telling people that they work such long hours, or don’t have much time for their children, because they want to give them everything they never had.

Believe me, your children would far rather have you be spending quality time with them, than be given all the toys that money can buy. Were they the ones who asked for a newer, or new car, or do you simply use that as an excuse to justify spending so much time away from them? Did they come to you and ask to move to a bigger house/more expensive neighbourhood? I think not.

In fact, many times, children don’t want the changes that accompany a more lavish lifestyle, because it often means moving away from familiar places, schools and friends which they have become accustomed to. More often, it’s a case of we give them what we think they need and want, rather than what they truly need.

Your child will cherish the times when they had your undivided attention, far more than they will cherish the latest toy. Good memories will always outlast the toys. A walk together, sharing an ice cream, and just listening to what your child has to say, without any interruptions, will be something they will enjoy. Be sure to try to turn your phone off while listening as well, because by interrupting those special moments with your child, it is telling him or her that other people are actually more important than he or she is.

Take time out to ask them how their day was. Be sure to listen carefully to their response though, because children know when adults aren’t really listening to them. Make eye contact. That way, you will often be able to tell if there is something wrong.

I know it isn’t always possible for a lot of parents, but try to be there when they play important school matches or games. If you can’t , at least let them know that you would rather be there than be at work, or meet the other obligations. But, mean what you say. Children will know if you don’t mean it.

Cherish the time with your children while you can. You never know what tomorrow may bring. Blink again, and they won’t be asking you to play, but rather, asking you for the car keys!